Denial
by chardonnay-lily
Summary: Cloud is the dumbstruck teenager who can't get Sephiroth out of his head. Sephiroth is the cold and closeted adult who can't get Cloud out of his life. Can the blonde even begin to gain his attention? Can the General even begin to allow himself to care? The twisted relationship of two differently affected people. Set in Crisis Core - Yaoi.
1. Virgin

**DENIAL**

****This is Yaoi.

This is Cloud and Sephiroth.

This is rude and offensive and completely obscure.

This is sexy, irritating, sad, funny, confusing, surprising and glorious.

**Chapter One: Virgin**

* * *

He bent down to the floor and picked up the fallen item.

Cloud turned every shade of red, snatching the condoms off the ground before anyone could see. This place was already terrifying at night; he didn't really need an extra excuse to be raped.

His eyes rested on the sell by date – 2 years from now – even that seemed a mission.

When would he ever have time to actually use these? He had enrolled in the Shinra Army, left his quiet redneck town behind and sauntered into Midgar. His mother had insisted he took them, assuming the barracks were more like a prison than a home. Cloud had tried to explain that the only use he would receive from them would be blowing condom balloons, not blowing _men_.

He threw them back into his pocket and stormed on.

The only action he could possibly be getting would be earned from his right hand – and even that would be limited once he started sharing a room with someone.

He retrieved the condoms back out of his pocket and stared down at them angrily.

There were ten of them, TEN! Cloud was going to struggle tearing open one, but ten? Was his dear old mom MOCKING him? He was a virgin, had never once had a boyfriend in his life, but she felt the need to buy him ten?

There was no need to keep these.

It all happened in slow motion; the multi-coloured pieces of plastic flying away from his hands and confirming once and for all that Cloud Strife would never get laid. He felt a slight pinch of guilt towards his mother, but decided that some straighter bastard would be able to get more use out of them anyway. It was only confirming the inevitable.

He breathed out a sigh of relief as the packets all fell beneath the bench in front of him.

The bench he was slowly edging to for no reason what-so-ever.

The bench that reminded him oh-so much of Nibelheim.

The bench that had been occupied throughout the entire situation.

_Occupied. Occupied. Occupied._

"… Fuck."

* * *

Time stood still.

There were no words that fitted his emotions at that moment in time. Nothing could quite describe the mortification he felt once his eyes drifted from the ground, onto the condom packets and then up onto the knees of a stranger.

Onto the knees of a STRANGER.

Who had been sat there THE ENTIRE TIME.

Cloud couldn't even run for it - it would look like a gift, as if he were presenting these condoms as a kind gesture.

He had to look up.

He forced himself to look up.

"I am familiar with being presented gifts," a dark voice said. "However, this is rather a surprise."

What could he do? Apologise and run off into the sunset? Laugh it all off as a joke? What if he just pulled one out the packet, peeled it down onto his face and suffocated himself to death?

"I'm really sorry!" he choked, almost tripping over himself. "I didn't realise anyone was…"

Cloud froze.

… That's when he realised _WHO _it was.

Then he really did trip over himself, body turning to nothingness, slamming onto the floor as if it were cushioned.

… _The General Sephiroth._

* * *

He physically could not move.

It should have been easier for him; run to the bench, pick up the discarded forms of embarrassment and sprint the hell out of there. But he couldn't. Cloud simply couldn't. His entire body was frozen and refusing to budge. All he could do was stare; mouth dangling open at the sight of his humiliation.

It got worse.

It had to get worse.

Cloud let out a tiny squeal; cringing as the General bent down and picked up the pile of condoms HIMSELF. All ten of them, not leaving a single one behind. The almighty Sephiroth was gathering up his condoms for him.

It wasn't hitting home.

"I'm curious," Sephiroth piped up, eyes locking with Cloud's. "Why are you throwing all of these away?"

The response on Cloud's face SCREAMED virgin.

"There aren't that many people like me in Midgar," Cloud admitted. "I decided I didn't need them."

Sephiroth look interested, not flinching once, never allowing the smile to fade. "Do enlighten me."

This wasn't what he had expected.

Cloud had wanted to snatch them away, jump on his stallion and ride away deep into the pit of no return. Why was Sephiroth asking questions? This wasn't a casual meeting; this was a HORRIBLE COINCIDENCE.

Cloud frowned a little. "I'm not really going to be using them on the women in Midgar."

He prayed to whatever God that he'd never bump into this individual EVER AGAIN. It was dark; that gave him hope that maybe Sephiroth couldn't see too well and wouldn't recognise his face. The Shinra building was a big place, right?

Sephiroth made it easier for him. "So you're a homosexual?"

Why were they discussing this?

"Yeah I am," Cloud shrugged, waiting in agony for an excuse to retrieve his items.

There was a flash in Sephiroth's eyes; his grin widening at the sides of his lips before splitting into a wide smile. It looked flirtatious, it looked suggestive. If Cloud didn't know better, he'd have assumed he was being eyed up.

The General could never be gay.

"Take these back," Sephiroth said, handing over the condoms to the blonde. "I am sure you will be using these in the nearby future."

Cloud quickly snatched them away. Was that a hint? Was that a suggestion?

"Thank you."

He felt his stomach somersault at Sephiroth sat before him; gazing at him as if he were the most tasteful dish alive. Cloud was a natural flirt; he couldn't help it, giving the man a subtle lick of the licks before laughing nervously.

"My name is -"

"Your name doesn't matter to me."

It wasn't said harshly or angrily, it was just a fact - Sephiroth hadn't stopped smiling.

"Do you have anywhere to go?" the General asked him, almost looking hopeful. "Wandering around Midgar at night, with nothing to do."

Another suggestion?

Cloud had no choice but to tell the truth. "I'm actually killing some time before tomorrow."

Now he was DEFINITELY going to remember him.

Sephiroth smirked a little. "What is happening to you tomorrow?"

It was a risk he had to take.

"I've just got some training to do," he said, wishing that he were a natural liar. "I've just joined the Shinra Academy, and…"

Those words rang in Sephiroth's head.

_Shinra academy._

_Shinra academy._

_Shinra academy._

Cloud didn't even get to finish his sentence.

There was a twitch of Sephiroth's lips; his smiling slowly fading into a grimace that he didn't even try to hide. His flirty eyes disappeared, replaced by an empty glow that carried no expression. Cloud felt those wandering eyes stare directly back up at him, away from his body and glare up at him as if he were shit on his shoe.

… Sephiroth was glaring at him.

"What is it?" Cloud asked, shocked by the sudden turn of expression. "Did I say something?"

The body language had changed from a casual slump into an upright tense position. Hands that had previously stroked the wood of the bench clenched tightly together. Something that could only be described as a seductive pose slowly turned into a stiff one.

"You are not wearing your uniform," Sephiroth said, mouth twitching in sheer panic. "You are in your normal clothes..."

Cloud was still confused. "Yeah, I know, it was our free day off, so I decided to go casual."

"You admit to me you are homosexual," he continued. "When you are well aware I am your general."

Cloud looked down. "Well, you were asking questions…"

Was that it?

Sephiroth had clearly viewed him as a normal Midgar citizen, a young boy strolling alone in the streets after a day of work or college. He had spoke to him and treated him nicely because he had _assumed _Cloud was a nobody, somebody he would never bump into or associate with again. If he'd have known he was in the same company, he wouldn't have taken the risk.

... Did that even sound right?

"Where are you going?" Cloud asked, watching as Sephiroth lifted off the bench.

He was ignored.

"Hey, wait!" he cried, following the General's large strides. "What did I say to anger you? You seemed really…"

Cloud stopped himself.

… Enthusiastic._  
_

Sephiroth stopped dead, almost making Cloud crash into his leather clothed back.

"Forget it," he said, turning round, grabbing Cloud's collar with his bare hands. "If you tell anyone this conversation happened, I'll _kill you_."

Cloud let out a whimper.

He was let go, shoved away, thrown back into the darkness of which he came.

Cloud wasn't an expert, nor did he have a gaydar, but he wasn't stupid.

… Was it possible that the almighty Sephiroth was… _deep in the closet_?

* * *

He didn't have the guts to ask.

* * *

**Please review, this is my first time, and I'll give whatever sexual favours in return for feedback.**

**xoxo**


	2. Panic

**DENIAL**

This is Yaoi.

This is Cloud and Sephiroth.

This is rude and offensive and completely obscure.

This is sexy, irritating, sad, funny, confusing, surprising and glorious.

**Chapter Two: Panic**

* * *

Cloud had looked everywhere for him: in the hallways, in the barracks, by the benches and even in the toilets. It seemed a weird scenario for the General to saunter into the Cadet bathroom, whip down his trousers and give them all a tasty show, but even that gave the blonde a glimpse of hope. He couldn't stop thinking about him and he didn't understand why.

Rejection was much more painful than he'd imagined.

His mother always used to preach that 'people adore those that ignore them and ignore those who adore them.' Was this just a challenge to him? Did this matter so much because Cloud liked the excitement?

After the little scenario by the benches; Cloud had finally forced himself to return to the barracks, where all the other Cadet's were squeezed together until rooms were appointed. He'd sat himself down, pulled out a condom, torn it open and began fiddling with it from boredom. Cloud had been tempted to roll it down his fist and see whether it fitted, but the look being given by a guy opposite him had changed that decision.

His head wasn't in the right place.

Sephiroth was the idol to all of them, even the 1st Class Soldier's, the guy everyone want to be or wanted to know. He was the one who appeared on the news, in the papers and on the bulletins plastered around Midgar. They all viewed him as a symbol, not a human being, with needs and emotions. Cloud hadn't even considered that the General could actually be a delicate man, behind all that armour.

Although, after last night, he didn't think delicate was the right word.

Cloud could only think of 'bastard.'

It seemed unrealistic though, for Sephiroth to have been flirting with him and questioning his sexuality on the first meeting. Cloud didn't exactly scream hetero, with his feminine appearance and stupidly fashionable outfit - he screamed FAGGOT.

All those hints, all those smirks, he could blame it on the dark, but they'd been stood beneath a street lamp.

He hadn't been drunk.

He hadn't been emotional.

He'd been completely and utterly aware of what he was doing.

Cloud had never considered the General as good looking before, though! Even when his mother had waved the newspaper in his face, plastered in Sephiroth's fake smile, not once had he felt an attraction.

Now he couldn't even imagine a better looking guy.

Sephiroth had gleaming eyes, not at all natural, but beautiful nonetheless. They were cold, full of colour but lacking the glow that regular people had, even when he'd tried to smile. His skin was porcelain, perfect to touch, well, at least, Cloud imagined it would be. There was a smirk that drove you to the point of dropping your boxers and pleading. His body looked like…

_looked like..._

… He had to stop.

Cloud was getting worked up.

Carrying a hard-on when greeting his new roommate wouldn't exactly get him a warm welcome. He already had a checklist of the reasons he would be bullied - his sexuality, his hair, his clothes. Cloud prayed that his roommate would be accepting, or even better, gay.

It was time to find out.

* * *

What could only be described as a walking blow up doll grunted to Cloud and gave him the permission to approach the desk. Not in the way that sexy girls look, when they resemble the balloon sex toys that men hide in their closets. Oh no, this girl looked like she'd literally been BLOWN UP.

"Name?" she sighed.

His accent caused a ruckus behind him. "Cloud Strife, sixteen."

"Didn't ask for your age."

Cloud bit his tongue, not wanting to cause an argument on the first day, allowing the moody woman to act like a complete bitch. She finally found his name, drew out an envelope and handed it to him.

"This contains the room you'll be in and the name of your roommate."

Cloud raised his eyebrow. "Could you not just tell us from your computer, instead of giving us these?"

There was silence.

If he hadn't of moved quicker, the poor woman might have eaten him.

He teared open the brown paper, heart hammering in anxiety and excitement. It wouldn't matter what it said yet, because any name could mean anything, and any room could lead to anyone. Cloud drew his attention down to the writing and read it out loud.

"Room 19c - Leon Blackwell."

The name didn't sound violent, or risky, or suggestive. Actually, it sounded like a perfectly normal name for a perfectly normal guy.

… Or so he hoped.

Cloud followed the building round, glancing up at the signs. People glared at him, liked he'd imagined, like they had back in Nibelheim. Most of them were all largely built, short-haired and mean looking, whilst the rest were just average looking guys.

It was like being back at school.

He might have clutched to himself protectively, waited for the first person to beat the shit out of him and send him to the medic, but he couldn't be like that anymore. Cloud needed to be proud. His shoulders were thrown high, his smile widened and whatever homosexual strut he had picked up was the strut he would goddamn use.

"Is this 19c?"

The guy he'd approached, looking completely stunned by it, nodded his head. "Yeah."

Cloud swallowed loudly.

He was signing his life away.

* * *

The door opened slowly, his teeth digging into his lips, his clammy hands sliding off the doorknob. He quickly imagined what this guy would look like, ginger hair? Blue eyes? Glasses?

Cloud was only picturing someone more worse off than him.

The door opened.

There was a disgusting smell lurking in the room, something he didn't recognize. The floor was covered in crap, clothes sprawled out everywhere, making him cringe. Cloud hated untidiness. His CD's were organised in alphabetical order and his cabinets all aligned perfectly with his stuff.

He looked away from the floor.

The top bunk was taken, presumably, meaning he'd have to sleep near the floor. He was annoyed he hadn't been asked, reluctantly throwing his bags onto the bottom bunk. The room was tiny - you'd be able to sit on the toilet, flick the kettle on and make a sandwich without moving.

... What had he done?

Cloud glanced towards the bathroom door, it was occupied, whatever roommate he had lurking inside.

He prayed he'd never come out.

But of course he did.

There was no warning Cloud could have been given to prepare him for the man that arose from the bathroom. His jaw dangled to the ground and his eyes practically smacked the poor kid across the face.

He was covered in piercings, head to toe, his eyebrows, lips, nose, earrings, neck. Tattoo's crawled up his arm, all the way to his chest, which was exposed due to a lack of top. Muscles he'd never seen before, abs upon abs, arms big enough to nest an entire family.

His hair was shaved, short and thuggish, stubble across his face. The guy was frowning, checking Cloud out in the same way, making him feel utterly conscious about his not-so-thuggish outfit. But he didn't want to base his opinion on looks, he hated being stereotyped and he hated doing it to others.

This guy could easily be a warm person, right?

"Who the fuck are you?"

Cloud decided that no, he wasn't a warm person, and yes, this was his cue to shrivel up and bawl.

Suddenly the thought of Sephiroth seemed far away…

* * *

**Already 6 reviews? I assume that's damn good, so thank you! You're all so nice - i'll give my body as a token of my appreciation.**

**Went away from the already messed up romance in this chapter, wanted Cloud to settle in nicely... or not.**

**Please review! It gives me the drive to keep writing, otherwise I think I'm doing bad, and then I'll get into a slump xoxo**


	3. Stage

**DENIAL**

This is Yaoi.

This is Cloud and Sephiroth.

This is rude and offensive and completely obscure.

This is sexy, irritating, sad, funny, confusing, surprising and glorious.

**Chapter Three: Stage**

* * *

There hadn't been a word spoken for at least two minutes. Cloud was frozen to the spot, gawping at the muscular thug stood before him, who was probably contemplating which leg to break first.

This wasn't a situation where Cloud could bargain with sexual favours…

"_Blow job and we'll call it even?"_

He imagined that this guy would shove his meat so far down his throat it came out the other end.

"Hey!" came from the door, snapping the pair out of their staring session. "You two need to come with us, there's an assembly being held for all the new cadets."

Was this Cloud's saviour?

His roommate raised an eyebrow. "Assembly? What for? How old are we, twelve?"

Cloud would have said something, but he couldn't, and now was frozen for an entirely different reason. Stood in the doorway, looking ridiculously appetizing, was a 1st Class Soldier, with hair similar to his and eyes that mentally undressed him. He was smiling, something Cloud had forgotten people could manage after being stared down for what seemed a lifetime. It was the sexiest smile he had ever seen and suddenly he had the urge to drape himself in those muscular arms.

"I'll go with you," the Soldier said to him, grinning. "We can walk together."

Cloud felt his groin twinge.

"No need for that," Leon interrupted, barging past the both of them. "I'll go with him, he'll get killed otherwise."

Cloud looked back at his roommate, unsure whether this was a trap or an actual invitation. Whichever it was, he surely wasn't going to complain, not when the guy could happily decapitate him in his sleep. He nodded at the Soldier, unable to speak or smile, following Leon shakily out of the room.

He felt a tap on his shoulder. "What's your name?"

"Cloud Strife, sir."

There was a silence, both of the men gawping at him, which he didn't understand. He went to repeat the sentence, opening his mouth again, before realising that no words were falling out. Cloud quickly cleared his throat, shook his head and actually managed to form a sentence.

"Cloud Strife, sir."

The Soldier laughed at him. "No need to get nervous just because I'm a higher rank. I'm Zack, you'll see me around a lot, I like to mingle with everyone here."

Cloud was glad that what he wanted to say WASN'T falling out this time.

_I'm not nervous because you're a higher rank._

_I'm nervous because you're making me flustered._

"Great to meet you Zack," he said.

He sighed to himself and quickly followed Leon down the stairs, looking down at his palms. It was a good thing he hadn't tried to shake their hands, they were clammy and sweaty enough to cause a tsunami.

Cloud smiled to himself. This was a good start, he had a roommate that was actually walking somewhere in his presence and had been approached by a very attractive Solder.

Perhaps this could be a new love interest?

_Don't kid yourself._

Cloud quickly threw the thought out of his head as soon as it had arrived. As much as he found this Zack good-looking and sexually appealing, there was still someone he had to put out of his mind first, and he hoped, with whatever God there was, that he wouldn't be bumping into that man today.

* * *

The main hall was absolutely huge, filled with young cadets, too many, to the point where they could barely fit in the room together. Cloud nudged Leon, pointing over to the huge mass of people. "This is mad, how do they expect to fit everyone in?"

"Perhaps you'll have to sit on my lap," was his reply.

Cloud hoped that was a joke.

They were approached by some of the Soldier's in the room, ushered to their seats before the rest of them even had a chance to sit down. He swallowed anxiously, mouth drying up as he realised exactly WHERE they were being seated. It wouldn't have been so bad if they were in the middle, or even better, positioned right at the back, but that wasn't happening for them, oh no. Cloud was being directed to the FRONT ROW.

"Do we have to sit here?" he whined, scowling as Leon happily took his seat directly in the middle chair. "Why can't we sit at the back?"

The Soldier rolled his eyes. "We need to keep order before the rest of them arrive."

"The rest of them?" Cloud said in disbelief. "Isn't this everyone?"

The man shook his head. "No," he sighed, turning to walk away. "This is about a quarter of the people attending."

Leon snickered beside him, without directly looking at him, attention drawn to the main stage. "Looks like you'll be sitting on someone's lap after all," he joked.

The rest of the seats filled up quickly, the cadets eager to listen to whatever show they were about to be given. Their knees practically rammed into Cloud's back, legs forced open due to the tightness of the space given to them. It should have been heaven for him, a room of guys with their packages being squeezed through their uniforms, but it wasn't. This was hell.

Cloud followed Leon's attention to the stage, his eyes resting on a short stumpy man fiddling with the microphone, wearing a look of total concentration. If he hadn't known better, he'd have assumed they were about to be serenaded. The man was muttering to himself. "Is this working?" It was definitely working, but unfortunately, no one was listening.

Everyone was finally arriving, the remaining cadets being throw on top of a group of already tightly packed cadets. It was like an involuntary gangbang, with their bodies tossed about onto one another. Cloud would applaud Shinra for many things, but it seemed planning wouldn't be one of them.

"SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP, YOU FUCKERS."

That certainly silenced the room, every man dropping their jaws at the sound of a Shinra employee screaming into the microphone. Cloud practically leaped out of his seat, but predictably, Leon didn't even flinch next to him.

After the pleasure of frightening the entire room, the violent man stepped backwards and allowed the overweight mumbling idiot return to the microphone. "That's better," he said simply.

No one dared to talked again.

"Welcome to the Shinra Electric Power Company!" he cried, enthusiasm screaming from him. "You might all be wondering why we have called his assembly, as the main introduction is tomorrow, but we have asked a speaker to be here for you today! I'm sure you'll all be very excited!"

Cloud hoped to fuck it wasn't the screamer from before.

"We have invited this very special man to inspire you all," he continued, quivering as he shouted into the microphone. "Please remember this is a very special event."

Leon snickered besides him. "With the way he's going on, you'd think the speaker was his husband."

Cloud stifled a laugh.

The plump bastard finally skipped off the stage, snatching a cloth from another employee and wiping his greasy forehead with it. They were all holding their breaths, waiting to see who exactly would be entering the stage. Cloud hoped it wasn't someone who would attempt to interact with him and try involving the audience, not when he was in the most obvious choice.

There was whispering, those on stage stepping back as a shadow draped across the curtain and took position in the centre. No one could quite make him out yet, but they were all guessing, muttering to one another. Although with the way they were all pushed together, it looked more like the group of them were sharing saliva.

Cloud frowned a little, trying to work it out himself. He could make out that whoever was behind that curtain was tall, much taller than he was. His shoulders seem high and stocky. The most bizarre part was his hair though, that draped far past his…

... _hips._

Oh God.

The curtain finally opened, all of the cadets quickly transforming from delicate men into screaming fan boys. They were silenced, or at least tried to be silenced, by the Soldier's in the middle of the room, but Cloud knew more than anyone that this man caused a riot wherever he went.

"The Great Sephiroth!" someone on staged declared. "Please be quiet!"

… This could not be happening.

Cloud watched in total distress as the General took to the stage and embraced the microphone as the blonde would embrace a naked man. He couldn't look away, even with the knowledge that their eyes could awkwardly meet as a result. Leon looked at him, but shrugged, assuming he was just reacting in the same dramatic way as everyone else. How could he have guessed the reason? Would any of the cadets even believe such a reason?

"_If you tell anyone we had this conversation, I'll kill you."_

Sephiroth grasped his hand around the microphone, staring out into the army of people, without emotion, without care. Their squeals of joy were greeted by a casual raise of the hand, at last silencing all of them. Cloud felt a lump form in his throat, as if that hand would be lowered down to punch him in the face.

He hadn't looked down yet.

It was a miracle that he hadn't looked down yet.

"You a fan?" Leon asked him.

Cloud managed to shake his head. "Not really, never been as obsessed as most people appear to be."

"Then why do you look like a love struck moron?"

He ignore that comment, eyes bravely following Sephiroth's every move, wondering why he hadn't began speaking yet. There was a spasm of his lips, his mouth finally about to move and deliver something to them... when he looked down. The hope of speech suddenly left him.

**He was looking down.**

Cloud felt his stomach clench, exhaling nervously as the General gazed at the front row, right into the middle, right into the dumbstruck blonde sitting there. Their eyes met, neither of them looking away, neither of them speaking; seconds passed, what felt like years, as the two of them gawped at one another in complete shock.

Sephiroth had suddenly turned shy.

Or, so it seemed.

The General looked him up and down, his face turning into a giant grimace, as if he had eaten something vile and the taste still rang in his mouth. There was panic too, his eyes flashing in worry, his tongue rolling out to lick his dry lips. Cloud could offer nothing, not a look of apology or wonder, he could only marvel.

There was not a single man daring enough to question Sephiroth's silence.

However, there was a single man daring enough to dart the hell out of that room.

"I need to pee."

* * *

Cloud flew from his seat like a freed prisoner flees to freedom; ignored the concerned comments from Leon beside him. He ran through the crowd, finding whatever door he could, any means of escape. There was no way he could suffer that intense moment, no way he could put himself through that again.

He looked up mid-sprint, eyes widening as a group of Soldier's appeared in his path, all holding their hands up to him. There wasn't time to consider what they were doing, before he was thrown straight into their solid bodies, those raised hands quickly clutching round his stomach and dragging him back to his seat.

"Where are you going?" Cloud whispered, watching as they leaded him far from the front row...

… Right towards the steps of the stage.

"I think you owe the General an apology," the one to his right spat, throwing his arms out and tossing the blonde.

Cloud turned back to the audience, eyes hopefully resting on Leon, who offered him a sly smirk.

What the hell was going on?

The same Soldier appeared again, pushing Cloud onto the stage, practically forcing him to walk directly onto it and take his position. He scurried on, making sure to stand as far away from Sephiroth as possible. That wasn't good enough though, of course it wasn't, as he felt himself be whisked towards the microphone, right next to the one person he was trying so hard to avoid.

He could practically feel Sephiroth tense next to him.

"Uh…"

Cloud had never faced this many people!

His fingers nervously grasped the mic stand, but his shaking hands made it rattle and clutter; he immediately let go and threw them into his pocket. How ironic, it had been this circumstance that had caused the problem in the first place - hands in pockets - throwing out his stash of condoms.

The Soldier at the front of the stage signalled for him to speak.

Cloud had no choice. "I, well, apologise…"

Not enough.

"Say it directly to the General!" the Soldier barked at him. "Apologise for your disrespect."

Cloud reluctantly turned to Sephiroth. "I apologise for disrespecting you… sir."

That seemed to be enough, as he was ushered to walk off the stage and join Leon back at his seat, but he couldn't just move away that easily. He stared up at Sephiroth, who looked as if he wanted to smirk, after the poor blonde had been humiliated in front of everyone, but simply couldn't. This was the worst scenario for the both of them.

Was it possible that Cloud was the only one in the room that questioned Sephiroth?

Was it possible that Cloud was the only one in the Shinra Building that questioned Sephiroth?

Could it be possible that Cloud was the only one in the world that questioned Sephiroth?

This was a man that always looked strong, screamed confidence and dominated the entire army without needing to control them with fear, but as he stood beside Cloud, and stood before the audience, all that the blonde saw… was fear.

His suspicion was seeming less and less ridiculous.

Cloud finally turned from the General, walking off the stage clumsily, waiting for the judgemental comments from the crowd. This was it, he had successfully ruined his already crushed reputation on the first day, people were never going to let this go. He waited for the predators to leap for the bait.

… But only laughter greeted him.

The entire room erupted into laughter, not the mocking kind or the cruel kind, but the kind that meant he had made a good impression. He heard shouts of congratulations, banter thrown about and the entire room wish to God that it could have been them on that stage.

Cloud had made them all laugh… but one.

And when he turned back to where he'd been stood, ready to throw whatever look Sephiroth's way, he felt his heart sink somewhat when he realised that the once occupied stage was empty. The General had slipped away behind the curtains; now the laughter seemed meaningless.

"I wonder where he went," Leon said as he sat back down. "You really caused a scene, kid."

Cloud forced himself to smile. "Somehow, I don't think that's what bothered him."

His eyes rested to the abandoned microphone, head swarming with thoughts, about Sephiroth, about what had happened, about the reason the General had disappeared without warning.

Was Cloud a threat?

Could Sephiroth really be... in denial?

* * *

**Third chapter, wow, reviews already, you guys make me stupidly happy, which is why I sit here with a cold, tissue up nostrils, to write this.**

**One reviewer requested I make the next chapter long, so I did, and now it's MUCH longer... my bad. **

**Please tell me what you thought, writing bigger amounts makes me fear the quality dropped - did it? Hearing what you think makes my entire week.  
**


	4. Spanking

**DENIAL**

This is Yaoi.

This is Cloud and Sephiroth.

This is rude and offensive and completely obscure.

This is sexy, irritating, sad, funny, confusing, surprising and glorious.

**Chapter Four: Spanking**

* * *

Cloud had spent the last few minutes reading a text he'd received after the sham of an assembly he'd managed to ruin. Of course, when seeing his phone flash, he had hoped that the General had somehow managed to require his number and was asking to de-flower him immediately, but of course, it was bad news, it was always going to be bad news.

The text stated that he was in serious trouble, and he was to report to a Soldier immediately, being given an apartment name and number to get to in the next hour. This was _real _business, this wasn't an office job, oh no, this was a 'sit on that chair and think about what you've done, whilst I pour you something to drink, you naughty little boy.'

He wished his punishment could be spanking…

Cloud jumped into the elevators, after asking a few of the employees where the apartment was and finally managing to translate the grunts he'd received. It turned out it was accessible through the Shinra building itself, with even better news! Sephiroth lived there too! The guy was considering just telling this Soldier to go fuck himself, whilst he went and got anally brutalized by the General.

If only stalking were socially accepted, or even more importantly, legal.

He watched as the interested glances in the elevator soon turned into smirks, and he felt them all nudge each other and whisper things. Now he was the company clown, like it or not, but at least it was better than being the company faggot.

The wait for the floor he needed seemed like a lifetime, and he reluctantly began to think about Sephiroth, and why he had run off so quickly, and what this whole thing actually meant. He wasn't a guy that could be easily frightened, or challenged, or manipulated, so why was something like this affecting him? Were Cloud's suspicions actually right?

It was insane though! He couldn't picture Sephiroth kissing a man, being romantic with a man, touching a man, although the thought did make _Cloud_ want to touch a man... that man being himself. The guy just seemed too hard, too masculine, too… straight, for no use of a better word.

The riot that would be caused if Sephiroth did suddenly burst forth from the closet would be unimaginable. Respect he had would decrease, for stupid reasons, but it would. He would go from an inspiration to a laughing stock, shamed in the papers, recommended for ballet classes, not fighting missions. Cloud was a dramatic person, he pictured everything in big colour and bold print, but he knew how the Media was, and he knew how the Shinra Corporation was. There was no way in hell Cloud was the only gay one there, but because of the strict rules and constant watch from every employee, being the way he was seemed unnatural.

Was that the reason that Sephiroth avoided it?

Cloud had seen the way he'd looked at him that night, the glances, the licking of his lips, the sly smirks and the suggestive hints. He was sure the General had wanted to ask him somewhere, to do something to him, to meet a stranger and finally be himself - of course he'd have denied it if the news ever got out and killed the guy if he'd taken it further, but that wasn't the point. If Cloud hadn't have been part of the company, or if he had never slipped that information out, would Sephiroth have tried anything with him?

Might his sweet virginity have been stripped away by the man?

The lift gradually came to a painful stop, Cloud leaping out of it, like a deer to grass, like a faggot to a sweaty man. He quickly sprinted through the long alleyway and prayed to God that Sephiroth wouldn't erupt from behind one of the doors. Or did he want that? To see the man fall out in a towel, catch Cloud's eye and then sneakily invite him inside?

Oh, what was he kidding, the guy would probably strangle him with the towel if and when he dropped it.

The doors were packed so closely together that Cloud imagined the walls were made of nothing but solid cardboard. Only two apartments separated from the rest, and they lay opposite one other, no names to be seen, all hope lost of seeing Sephiroth. It was the one to the left that he had to knock, and walking towards it seemed like walking towards his death.

What if it were actually Sephiroth at the door, and the entire thing had been a ploy? That he had simply wanted to punish the guy himself, in his own apartment, away from prying eyes? Cloud would accept whips and chains, but like hell would he allow himself to be lectured.

His heart was hammering at the possibility.

Cloud knocked on the door, delicately, in hope that it would go unnoticed. But of course, he heard footsteps, loud footsteps, and he prepared himself for a giant fist to come hammering down. He wasn't manly in the slightest, and if he got punched, he'd probably clutch his face for a few seconds and then flee into the sunset. Cloud couldn't be violent, it wasn't how he was, gay or not, he'd just been brought up too well.

And then the door finally opened.

There was no punch to the face for the blonde, there was no sigh of disappointment, or the look of shame and dishonour, oh no, only a face of pure beauty stared down at him and turned his body into a throbbing heat. Cloud felt himself whine, only quietly, but enough to rare his senses into action. It wasn't Sephiroth at the door, but, this sight was still satisfying enough.

"Hello again, Strife."

* * *

Cloud could barely respond without spewing his own semen. "Hello, Zack... I think it was?"

Oh he knew very well what his name was; the guy had mentally saved it in his brain and vowed to keep it there until the day he died, or even better, the day he turned straight. That face was certainly not one he could forget so easily, not that smile, or that godly build.

Why couldn't he have met THIS guy first?

"Come on in," Zack purred, leading the way for the trembling blonde. "Excuse the mess."

That wasn't an exaggeration.

The blonde had to clamber over sprawled boxers, discarded towels and empty food packaging. It was like walking through the slums, only indoors. The urge to pick up a pair of tight Calvin Klein's and sniff them was strong, before he remembered that would most definitely get him locked up, or even worse, put down. Cloud decided to ignore the wonderfully tight items of clothing below him and instead followed the gorgeous man into what he imagined was the living room. Or, should he say, that gorgeous ass.

"Would you like something to drink?" Zack asked him, throwing himself onto the sofa.

Cloud awkwardly perched opposite him. "No thank you, I'm not thirsty."

_I'm not thirsty, _he said, as his mouth began to leak dust and fill up with saliva. Oh God, was he thirsty, but holding a glass of water seemed a task, as he was shaking so much.

"Well, let's get started then," Zack said, his tone becoming much more serious. "You know why you're here, right?"

Cloud fidgeted in his seat, panicking, knowing that his body would soon be turned to nothing but sweat, and leather wasn't something that agreed with bodily fluid. "I imagine it was the assembly."

"That's correct, you made a fool out of the General, and they've asked me to punish you."

There was a twinge in the blonde's groin.

"However, they've asked the wrong guy," Zack smiled, leaning forward to pat his knee. "I don't think you meant to cause any of that, and I'm not the type of person to start screaming."

The touch of that hand felt orgasmic.

"So why have you called me here?" Cloud asked, barely able to keep himself from shuddering. "What's the need to see me if I wont be punished?"

There was a suspicious glint in the Soldier's eyes. "I was curious, that's all."

"What about exactly?"

"You seemed to run out pretty sharpish," Zack pointed out. "I wondered if it was anything to do with Sephiroth."

Cloud felt like he were swallowing his entire mouth. "No, not at all, why would you imagine that?"

"Intuition is all, I know a lot of guys get nervous around him, but never enough to flee from him."

… What on earth was Cloud supposed to say?

Own up to why he had tried to run? Go into detail about his little suspicion? For all he knew, Zack and Sephiroth could know one another, be in a relationship, be somehow related! This might be a test sent from the General, to assure his trust remained, before slitting his throat if he dared to speak up.

"No, not at all, I just really needed the toilet."

Cloud applauded his efforts, at least, but not his honesty.

There was silence in the room, not awkward, but a tad uncomfortable. Zack was clearly trying to work things out in his head, and the blonde was trying to think of all the comebacks he may need. This was much more casual than it should have been, so relaxed. Cloud enjoyed being so close to such a high member in the company, actually associating with someone of high ranking. He enjoyed it so much, so lost in the moment, that his next sentence took them both by surprise.

"Is there anything about General Sephiroth that you'd consider different?"

Oh God.

There was no turning back now.

"What do you mean?" Zack asked, raising his eyebrow. "There are many strange things about Sephiroth, were you thinking of one in particular?"

Cloud couldn't think of any excuses. "It's nothing serious, I just… had a suspicion."

His head was bowing to the floor.

How on earth was he supposed to ask such a bizarre thing?

"Well, state what you find strange," Zack said, genuinely interested to know. "And I'll try my best to answer it."

Cloud looked up at him, thinking of the best way to word it. There were ways he could avoid this mess, but if he were being honest, half of him needed to know if anyone else thought what he did, or whether he was just being paranoid about it. Besides, these men were sworn to confidentiality, right? And Cloud could easily blab himself, blackmail him with the information that the 1st Class Soldier they'd sent to deal with him had in fact ignored all punishment together.

"You wont tell anyone I said it?" Cloud practically begged.

Zack nodded his head. "I promise, I'm not like that in the slightest, and it's probably something we all know."

There was really only one simple, frightening, ridiculous and utterly blunt way to put it.

"Is the General… gay?"

Cloud had expected many things; maybe a look of horror, or a punch to his stomach, or maybe even a double take and request to repeat the question. But he couldn't believe, as he stared as Zack with what could only be described as an ill expression, that all that fell from his mouth... was laughter.

The man was LAUGHING at him!

"Is that a genuine question?" Zack wheezed, clutching himself from all the hysterics. "Are you being serious?"

The blonde shuffled in his seat. "Yeah, I suppose it was a little strange."

Now he looked utterly ridiculous, perched in his seat, blushing like hell, sweat pouring from his forehead like water from a tap. What sane person WOULDN'T find that question funny? Why had he even had the guts to ask someone like that? Cloud didn't want to look needy, or give his position away, but there didn't seem to be any other reason as to why he would ask.

It was obvious… Cloud was _infatuated _with him.

"Let me tell you something," Zack said, leaning forward to clutch his leg. "Never go repeating that, seriously, because the company will tear you apart."

He had expected that.

"Sephiroth is about as gay as your hair is flat, which judging by those spikes, is not at all."

But not that.

Cloud felt something form in his throat, which he quickly swallowed down, afraid it was tears, worried he were about to break down on the floor. It wasn't sadness though, or anger, it was just embarrassment, embarrassed that he'd even put himself in this situation.

What if Zack were right? What if the General wasn't gay? What if Cloud had just been hopeful?

He knew how people could become when obsessed, they would make up scenario's in their heads, see things differently to reality, imagine one thing meant another, when actually, it meant nothing. It all seemed to piece together now, why Sephiroth had gotten so angry, why he'd backed off quickly. Cloud had come on too strong, assumed things, given the wrong message, and Sephiroth had ran away.

Was that it?

Could Cloud really have gotten all the signs wrong?

"Can I ask you a question?" Zack said.

Cloud nodded his head with whatever energy he had left. "Yeah."

"Are you gay?" he asked, frowning a little as he did. "Does this have anything to do with your orientation?"

"Uh…"

Cloud turned towards the window.

Zack turned towards the hall.

There was somebody knocking at the door, praise Gaia, there was somebody here to save him!

"I'll just go get that," Zack said, patting the blonde's knee as he got up. "Don't look so worried, kiddo."

Cloud wasn't worried, oh no, he was DISTRAUGHT. He felt like he were about to vomit blood.

He listened as the footsteps got quieter and quieter, but the knocking grew louder and louder; the guest impatiently hammering at the same beat as Cloud's heart. The sound of Zack turning the handle made him all the more queasy, and he hoped it would be something to get him the hell out of this apartment.

There came an irritated voice. "Take your time answering the door, why don't you."

"Oh, it's you!" Zack tittered, the door closing behind him. "My apologies, I have a guest, but that's a different story all together."

It was the next sentence that killed him.

"How very ironic of you to show up."

But the second one brought him back to life.

"We were just talking about you."

* * *

**Sorry it took so long to update, busy life, work, college, actually making one self leave the glory of her secluded room.  
PLEASE REVIEW. PLEASE. PLEASE. REVIEW. REVIEW. NOW. DO IT NOW! EVEN IF YOU NEVER HAVE BEFORE!  
IF YOUR REVIEW TOUCHES ME, OR MAKES ME SMILE, I'LL DEDICATE THE NEXT CHAPTER TO YOU! OKAY?**

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